Tiger columns I wish I’d written
Best three I’ve seen. Now, I’m going TIGER DARK until he actually plays golf again.
My thought was: Why isn’t he laughing? Why isn’t he at least shrugging and sighing and saying, “Hey you know what? Life is ridiculous. Life is hard. Life is a mixed blessing crapfest thrillride joyburden, Katie. Even for me. Especially for me. Isn’t it all hilarious and amazing? I’m still here! Did some dumb things, dated some very dumb people, wasn’t the most honest with my wife. Then I fixed it. Everybody happy? Good. Let’s get in the hot tub.”
“Many of my journalistic brothers and sisters are foaming at the laptop because Tiger is not having a full-fledged press conference today and won’t be taking any questions from the media. I’m not. I’d handle it just like Tiger is handling it.”
“My least favorite part of the speech: “But still, I know I have bitterly disappointed all of you. I have made you question who I am and how I could have done the things I did. I’m embarrassed that I have put you in this position. For all that I have done, I am so sorry. I have a lot to atone for.”
Big mistake. And plastic. I would have played the “I became a celebrity too soon, I had too many people kissing my butt too soon, I had everything handed to me, I began to think I was invincible and that my behavior had no consequences” card right here.”
